The Diary of Hoodie Girl

Dear Diary… If there’s one prayer I’ve whispered more times than I can count, it’s the “I don’t know” prayer. ‘I don’t know how this is going to happen. I don’t know how You’re going to save me. I don’t even know my next step… but I trust You’ People always talk about trusting God, but let’s be real. Most of the time, we only “trust” when we already have some sort of backup plan. We pray about something, but deep down, it’s because we kind of know how it’s going to work out. It’s like we’ve already planned it all out and then added God in, thinking, ‘Well, now that God’s in on it, it’s bound to work’. Honestly, sometimes it feels like I’m trying to convince God to do it my way. But what about when it doesn’t work out? What about when everything you thought was certain starts crumbling? When all your plans fall apart and you’re just… stuck. What then? As someone who overthinks everything, I’ve learned to just let it be when it comes to God. And trust me, that’s hard. It doesn’t mean I...

  Dear Diary... How do I even begin to explain what anxiety feels like? On most days, it’s like a silent sea, calm on the surface but with chaos brewing underneath. Inside, it’s all battles and noise. Then there are those other days. The ones where it feels like my body’s alarm system is on overdrive, screaming at full blast for no reason I can see. My heart starts pounding like it’s running a marathon I didn’t sign up for, and suddenly, I can’t breathe right. It’s like my body forgot how to do something as basic as breathing. My brain, decides this must mean danger, even though there’s nothing wrong. I look around, trying to find the threat, but there’s nothing. Nothing except this overwhelming feeling that something terrible is about to happen. And yet, my body doesn’t seem to care that I’m actually safe. It’s exhausting, confusing, and terrifying all at once. All I want in those moments is a way out, a clear exit sign, anything to stop feeling this way. “It’ll pass,” I tell myse...

Dear Diary... Life really is unpredictably unpredictable, isn’t it? It doesn’t care who I am, where I’m coming from, or what I’m doing right now. It just keeps moving, like a river that doesn’t stop for anything. One moment, I could be talking to a stranger, and the next? They might turn out to be the soulmate I didn’t even know I was waiting for. But when things go wrong, like a breakup, a bad day, or, God forbid, losing someone I love, life slows to a crawl. Time drags, and I’m forced to sit with all the pain. I’ve tried ignoring it, drowning it out, or pretending it’s not there, but nope. Life doesn’t let me off the hook. It’s like it’s saying, “You’ll sit with this until you learn something. If you don’t, I’ll just keep bringing it back.” Honestly, it’s exhausting. And then there are the happy moments, the ones I should enjoy. But do I? Nope. My brain decides to overanalyze every single detail. Is this moment too good to be true? What if it doesn’t last? What if something goes wron...

Dear Diary ... Unlike those pink, heart-shaped, padlocked diaries people hide under their floorboards, I’m starting one of my own. Do I really need this? Probably. Overthinking doesn’t leave much room for clarity, so maybe writing it all down will help. I could call it a blog, but let’s be honest—it’s more about me working through my thoughts than anything else. That’s okay, right? Here’s the plan: I’ll write about my thoughts, share personal stories, and create a safe space for anyone reading. I hope someone out there reads this and thinks, “I went through this too. I’m not a weirdo for feeling like this.” And maybe I’ll remind myself of that as well. I’ll share fun memories, not-so-fun ones, and all the random nonsense in between. Life doesn’t always have to be so serious, even when serious things are happening. Sometimes nonsense really does make the most sense. If this diary helps me untangle my thoughts and brings comfort to someone else, that’s enough. Writing feels like putting ...